• Ideas borrowed from Jan Allen, CSW, MSE &  other DPISD Counselors
     
     
    For those who are grieving, let us:
     
    ENCOURAGE OUR LOVED ONES TO GRIEVE...
    -for as long as they need to, -with as many tears as they need to, -with whatever process they
     need to.
     
    GRIEVING IS VERY DIFFERENT FOR EACH PERSON.
    IDEAS FOR THOSE GRIEVING:
    visiting the graveside, going to old hang outs, keeping the same routines, painting or drawing,

    lighting a candle in memory, creating a memory book of photos of your loved one ,writing a poem or story about him/her, visiting a place you both liked to visit, hanging a special ornament on the tree in his/her memory,playing his/her favorite music, sharing memories of him/her with friends and family,

    creating a memory box of items that were special, honoring his/her favorite tradition, creating a new tradition in his/her memory, gathering your family and friends together in celebration of him.

     

     
    We can help by perhaps giving the gift of a special journal to our grieving loved one. We can help by understanding that grieving is sometimes a very introspective time so the person may not be as open to communicating, going out or being involved in family or community events.
     
    Those of us who have not had a heavy grief to bear often do not understand how important it is for those who are grieving to talk about their sadness.  We are embarrassed or uncomfortable.  Sometimes we even think we are making them worse to talk about their sadness.
     
     
    Rather than being concerned about getting our loved ones back to normal we can walk them through the darkness, sadness, doubt and questioning until we both come out into the light of a new day.  Not "back to normal" -- just a new day with new hope.
     
    In summary... we can pray for them, encourage them, listen to them, find time to spend with them, cry, mourn with them, be open to discussing their loss, And after a suitable time encourage or invite them to new activities and or other friends.
     
    Resources:
     
    Gone but Not Lost: Grieving the Death of a Child by David W. Wiersbe
    When A Friend Dies by Ed.D. Marilyn E. Gootman, Pamela Espeland (Editor)
    Grieving Mindfully by Sameet M. Kumar
    Helping Children Cope with the Loss of a Loved One: A Guide for Grownups by William C. Kroen